A blog for the New Zealand creative advertising industry, now at www.campaignbrief.com/nz. Email news to: michael@campaignbrief.com

Monday, March 20, 2006


Right. I’ve had a few drinks so I’ll make this short.

I’ve seen the Grand Axis post, wadda ya reckon we all crawl out of our anonymous little holes and get together every 6 months to celebrate the really crap ads out there. We could get a presenter that is pretty shit in their own right (like Darren McDonald ) and drink loads of piss and like ‘The Warriors’ movie, forget about our gang colours for a while and celebrate the fact that some ads really suck big time. It could be called "THE ADZ AWARDZ". Entries could only be submitted if they are photocopied, on C60 cassette tape or on uncued VHS with 'RTR COUNTDOWN" written on it in biro. Entries would obviously be fuckin expensive, like $3, and like other award shows we could have a ridiculously huge amount of categories to rake in the money. The Worst retouching in an ad could be judged by a pack of drunken mac ops. Someone from Viva could be official convener of who has done the absolutely most fucked in-house radio ad (probably Magnis Benrow). Then there would be the Prime TV award for worst handy cam usage (anything on Indian TV) and a the best personal appearance in their own ad (Mike Loader Motors). I’m partial to large logos, but I’ll concede this could be a category too, as could the best use of a washed up celebrity. By about this time we’d all be absolutely hammered, Darren would be sick to death of people talking too loudly and would offer up handfuls of hardcore drugs to get the dancing going. We’d then all split up and go to loads of different bars, drink till 5 in the morning then cop off with the fat chick from finance. This would be done on a week night, because they always are. Anyway, who’s in?

PS, Can someone get a suit onto it. I can’t be fucked organising it.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Genius idea. Let's do it.

Ps. It's actually Rob Loader and all his cars drive perfectly.

10:02 PM NZST

Anonymous Uncle Crusher said...

Thanks for that Mark. And taking a cue from CAANZ, we would send you an email reminder about these awards every 5 minutes for 4 months, flooding your inbox and preventing you from making an good ads because yoiu're too busy deleting spam.

10:18 PM NZST

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You'd have to have a category for the really big budget fuck-ups. It's all very well doing a naff retail ad (thank-you Rob Loader Motors!) but it takes a truly perverse talent to do something diabolical with a ton of money.

Any nominations?

10:34 PM NZST

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brilliant. How about the scam ad that was viewed by the least people.

7:13 AM NZST

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some categories to consider:

1. Most Retarded Talent.

2. Most Gratuitous Use of an Australian Celebrity no Kiwi has ever Heard Of.

3. Cheesiest Jingle

For 1 I nominate Wendy's and for 2 that Wrigley's skiing chick ("the yummy taste of lollies") comes to mind.

7:43 AM NZST

Anonymous Anonymous said...

This could be brilliant.

8:12 AM NZST

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whoever thought this up, phone up David Gapes and see if he'd be keen to co-organise it. Sounds like a good idea. A few of us have talked about this when we've been at drunken ad gigs so it's good that you've actually vocalised a bloody good idea. Now back to your DM mailer...

8:35 AM NZST

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd like to see "Best Use of New Zealand Accent Voice dubbed over shithouse Australian/American ad".

9:18 AM NZST

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I only know one person who would write "I’m partial to large logos"

9:51 AM NZST


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