A blog for the New Zealand creative advertising industry, now at www.campaignbrief.com/nz. Email news to: michael@campaignbrief.com

Friday, March 03, 2006

Film Companies unite to service locals better.

 Auckland based film companies Mopix and Republic films have united to form a new company called ‘Automatic’ and have set up offices in the old Carters building in Morningside.  Automatic will represent the directors Sigi Spath, Simon Mark-Brown, Greg Wood, Brian Challis, Mike Oldershaw, Alyx Duncan, Fane Flaws and Tony Drayton as well as Australian directors Mick Connolly and Darren Ashton.  “We’ve all known each other for years” says Producer Declan Cahill “and we’ve always got on with each other so it made sense for us to join forces”.  Republic’s Simon Mark-Brown also says “the new strength in numbers means we can really dedicate ourselves to the local market where we feel our loyalties truly lie.”

44 Comments:

Anonymous Simon Mark-Brown said...

Is that it?! Is that the press release you’ve been ‘working-on’ for the last two weeks?! Fuck-me-sideways it’s no wonder you and Sigi haven’t been getting any work if that’s the best you can do, your director’s treatments must be fucking awful.

1:33 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Declin Cahill said...

Producers and Creatives don’t want a bunch of waffle or gimmicks. They just want to know the facts. We decided to keep it simple and just let everyone know what was going on. The press release might not be great but it’s still better then sending everyone a fucking t-shirt.

1:34 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Sigi Spath said...

Here’s a treatment for you .

We open on a dimly lit room in a mundane office building. The camera is at eye level. The room appears empty but we can hear a voice ranting incoherently. The camera slowly tilts down three feet to reveal the voice is coming from an unusually short man in an ill-fitting Republic T-shirt.

Cut to graphic: Fuck you Simon.

1:35 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Simon Mark-Brown said...

Hardy-fucking-ha-ha. At least we had a name to put on a T-shirt, Jeez you guys have had so many name changes in the last six months you’ve become a standing joke. And what’s this bullshit about me saying in the press release “the new strength in numbers means we can really dedicate ourselves to the local market where we feel our loyalties truly lie”?! I never fucking said that! it doesn’t even make sense and I come across looking like a prat.

1:36 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Greg Wood said...

Simon’s right, the press release is pretty lame. It doesn’t say anything about us, it doesn’t say anything about what we want to do and it doesn’t really explain why we have all decided to join up in the first place. How about we do our own 24 hour film festival? We all get Bolex’s and then we all shoot our own interpretation of another director? Could be kind of cool… and then we could invite all the agencies to a showing in an old warehouse with huge speakers pumping out electronic music etc.

1:37 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Sigi Spath said...

Grown-ups are talking here Greg, why don’t you go and have a nice cup of tea with the photographer...

1:38 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Tony Drayton said...

Get fucked Sigi.

1:39 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Mike Oldershaw said...

Jeez you guys are angry bastards. I thought the whole idea of Automatic was for us directors to come together and work as a team.

1:39 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Sigi Spath said...

Who the fuck is Mike Oldershaw?

1:43 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Darren Ashton said...

There’s no ‘I’ in team…

1:45 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Fane Flaws said...

…but there’s a “U” in cunt dickhead.

1:47 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Darren Ashton said...

That's lovely. I’m surprised you can spell or even have a computer let alone know how to work it. Shouldn’t you be painting some sort of over-priced piece of crap instead of pretending to be a director?

1:49 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Fane Flaws said...

Darren fuckin Ashton - world famous for doing fuck all. Where would Proctor and Gamble be without you.

1:55 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Darren Ashton said...

At least my claim to fame isn’t some crap song from the 70’s! “TEARS! I feel them on my cheeks, TEARS! I’ve been this way for weeks, TEARS! I’m right back at the start, TEARS! You’re TEARING ME APART!”

Nice work. You rhymed ‘cheeks’ with ‘weeks’.

1:56 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Fane Flaws said...

Well at least you remember the song which is more than can be said for anything on your forgettable reel - I had a record contract with Mushroom once - It was run by Michael Gudinski - another typical Aussie - so tight he'd go underwater and give head to fish if there was a dollar in the tank! You’re all the fucking same.

1:57 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Declan Cahill said...

Mike’s right, bickering amongst ourselves is not helpful. We need to present a unified front for Automatic both here and in Australia. Automatic needs to be known as the default film house for the best directors in both countries. And this is going to require some serious bullshitting from everybody.

1:58 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Sigi Spath said...

Seriously. Who the fuck is Mike Oldershaw?

1:59 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Brian Challis said...

I think the whole Automatic thing is good but I don’t know why we have to hook up with these Australian guys at all. Darren Ashton is a horribly working class Ozzie (probably from some god forsaken Queensland outback dump), sure he’s quite funny and quite good but hardly worth the extra $650 to fly him over though surely?

Mick Connelly’s from Melbourne so a bit better but still Australian at the end of the day. Again quite funny, quite dry, quite good, but I think Melbourne’s about $700 away so again, not really worth it.

2:00 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Mick Connelly said...

You kiwis are so far up your own arses. Look at the ‘talent’ we have to push over here for you.

Sigi Spath - who’s so f*cked up he thinks Declan’s a good producer.

Simon Mark Brown – who everyone just calls “that c*nt Simon”

Fane Flaws – whose whole reel looks like f*cking bad 60’s art wank.

Greg Wood – whose whole reel looks like he was taught directing by Fane Flaws.

Brian Challis – who you can’t even guarantee will turn up for a shoot if there’s surf.

Alyx Duncan – who can’t even spell her own god damn name right.

Tony Drayton – who’s just a f*cking photographer.

And some guy called Mike Oldershaw that nobody’s even heard of!

F*ck me! If it wasn’t for me and Darren you’d have f*ck all!

2:05 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Tony Drayton said...

I’m not a fucking photographer!!!

2:06 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hate to break up your mutual scammy lovefest boys, but we get the picture; clever bit of aggro PR

8:51 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Rushing in.

8:52 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Jello Biafra said...

Good idea.

Can you bring in Vic Wakem on reception?

9:04 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Jello Biafra said...

Good idea.

Can you bring in Vic Wakem on reception?

9:06 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heard you the first time JB.

9:24 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous nicfin said...

quite funny for a bunch of filmo's

9:25 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like the T Shirts. It's the only bit of new clothing I get every year. Crap name tho - Automatic. If it was automatic we wouldn't need youse fuckers. Apart from the T shirts of course.

9:33 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is fucking awesome!!!! funny bastards.

10:32 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can't wear T-shirts.

10:43 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Farkin good on youse.

11:07 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is this some NZGIRL stunt. Come on Jenene fess-up.

11:08 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

But in this case no one got hurt.

11:24 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Will miss those T-shirts.
Had an idea for one actually
"Give us those scripts you can't face."

12:22 PM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm a large. After going through the dryer I'm a medium.

12:40 PM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Everyone hold hands - I'm a medium.

1:08 PM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

2 negatives don't make a positive....

3:05 PM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is that you noonan ?

3:16 PM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Two negatives make a print campaign. Three's better.

3:24 PM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

who the f%%k is Declan Cahilll? Aint he Ian Gibbons bum boy from the 80's?

4:49 PM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

so what happened to charlotte the ....

5:03 PM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Does this mean we won't get Christmas t-shirts any more ?

5:30 PM NZDT

 
Blogger nzcreativecircle said...

Anybody who can't write fuck on this fucking blog and has to use *#** is a clearly a cunt from the 50's.

Is this the NZ Herald writing?

10:39 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good lads. Good couple of companies. Good luck.

9:28 AM NZDT

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Two positives don't make a negative...

Any gay couple with aids will tell you that

12:51 PM NZDT

 

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